Yay, surgery is over and once again I am on the road to recovery.
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I had my operation last Tuesday…Almost a week post op!!! This is so important and a huge hurdle overcome. Some of you may remember that last February I had this same surgery to rebuild my leg but the donor site was from my right leg. All was well (“was loving my new skinny legs”) but for unknown reasons, the flap rejected 6 days later on Feb 14th. It was a bad day. For the past year, we have been prepping & nurturing the site for this repeat operation using a different donor site. Today was day 6 post op & the flap looks great. Tomorrow, the docs will remove my cast & dressings to take a better look but we are expecting great outcomes. Please pray &/or keep fingers & toes crossed that all is well. 

So what exactly did they do? Â
My plastics team reconstructed my left leg using parts from my abdomen. They removed abdominal muscle and placed it over the femur. They then removed a flap from my tummy to cover the bite area as best as they could. Despite fattening up for this surgery with an all-you-can-eat diet, I apparently still didn’t have enough to cover the whole wound. My surgeon cut the largest flap she could then went to close my tummy but realized it is too tight. It is so tight that I am unable to lie flat at this time and must remain in a seated position. I also have to keep my leg elevated so I’m stuck in this poorly executed jackknife position. It’s quite funny but hey, I’m not complaining. I have a flat tummy again!!
I have to send out thanks for the millions of offers I received for donor fat. No really…millions offered selflessly give up their personal cushion for me. Sorry that I couldn’t take up the offers.Â
It is truly amazing what medicine can do and I am so thankful for my plastic surgeons, especially Dr. Snell, who have invested, even sacrificed, so much of their time to strive for a successful outcome for me.     Â
I was also to have a stump revision and nerve exploration to my left arm. When the orthopedic surgeon opened my stump however, he decided he only needed to make one revision which did not involve cutting more bone-which was expected. Whew!! He also decided not do a part of the surgery which I felt was important (a nerve repair) therefore I’m not convinced that my arm pain will be entirely resolved, but at this point, I must give the benefit of doubt to the professionals & will hope that this too will be the end of operations to my arm so that I can move forward with my prosthetic pain free.

I am on total bed rest and expect to be this way for a while. “Joy oh bliss” she said with sarcasm but willing to do whatever it takes to make the surgeries a success. The original hospital stay was quoted about 6 weeks. I quickly begged for leniency and negotiated 3 weeks in hospital (if all went well) followed by 2-3 weeks bed rest at home.Â
Since being admitted to my favorite unit at Sunnybrook, things are progressing well. I, of course, hope to accelerate this estimate & my surgeon may agree to 2 weeks hospital stay if everything looks well tomorrow (now today):).

How am I feeling? Everything aches this time (like I’ve been hit by a truck) but far less intense compared to what I had to endure last year so I won’t complain. Each day, is better than the last. I feel sad to leave my beautiful girls at home while mommy goes away again, sorry for having to put my wonderful husband through this again, guilty to burden my father further even though I know he loves being needed, and frustrated at times that I have to do this again.
BUT…I am alive. I am healthy enough to endure these operations. I am strong enough to recover quickly. I am wise enough to know that even though I feel sad, guilty, sorry & frustrated, that it’s ok. I am loved enough to know that nothing else matters.Â
I am elated that it’s over and once again I am on the road to recovery. 

I can hardly believe it, but yes, it has been a year since my shark attack.
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So much has happened, so much achieved, but how does one summarize a year of challenges? I don’t know, but I’ll try.
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Firstly, however, I wish to send out an apology. It has been a long time since I’ve posted an update on my blog. Many people have told me that they enjoyed my blog & have missed my postings.  To those who have been waiting & searching for an update, I apologize. I intended to post the occasional update and started to write a post several times, but it never came to fruition. I wanted to focus on me, my family & my recovery and am glad I did so. 

I have physio’d my butt off and have been busy trying to regain some lost muscle and mobility. Shortly after coming home, I developed some issues with my knee & shoulder on my affected side. It slowed my recovery & made it more painful but hey, what’s a couple more challenges? I am currently walking very well without any aids and hardly have a limp. That’s impressive, even to me, considering I’m missing 2 of 4 quadricep muscles & almost 2 of 3 hamstrings. I’m not running yet but hope to one day. Over the summer I was able to swim, walk, climb & kayak. How does one kayak with one arm you ask? A paddle kayak. It was awesome!!! I have mastered the stationary bike and am able to walk some stairs. In fact, I have resumed my aerobic step classes once again with “my chicas” that I went to Mexico with originally. As for my arm, it has not progressed as I had expected. I have a wonderful team working on a prosthetic arm for me. In late spring, they let me take it home & I felt like it was Christmas. I loved having it and adapted to it really well but it caused incredible pain. Being a new amputee, I figured this was to be expected and continued on. Me & my prosthetic team worked hard on finding a solution but in the end, the pain was too much and my stump was swelling. An MRI revealed a couple issues to my affected arm causing the pain and swelling. The prosthetic would have to wait until the stump could be fixed. I have been unable to wear it for 6 months. . Pain has been the biggest problem with the arm but hopefully it will be improved soon.  Â
This takes us to present time. In a couple of hours, I return to hospital for some further operations. One one them being a revision of my stump which I hope will take care of any issues so I can move forward with my prosthetic. My incredible plastics team will also be reconstructing my leg. They will try once again to create a flap to cover my femur which currently only has a few milimeters of skin covering it. This time they will be taking a muscle from my abdomen and placing it over my femur then cover it with a skin flap from my belly. Medicine absolutely amazes me with the things that can be done. They are major surgeries that basically put me back to where I was a year ago & comes with the price of another long hospital stay, away from my children again, but there are perks too. I have been on an all-you-can-eat diet in order to grow a big enough belly to cover the leg. It’s been awesome, especially around Christmas. When they cut out the flap from the belly…instant tummy tuck to fix it. If only they could fix the butt that came with the belly but I’ll work on that later. I’m really going to miss this diet though.
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My family have been wonderful & my kids have loved having mommy home. I think I enjoyed being home with them more however, because I was one of the few parents that were sad when summer& Christmas was over and the kids had to return to school.   Â
A lot of people ask me how I’ve been coping and I must say that I have been very fortunate. I have never had any significant post traumatic stress from the attack and no nightmares. That said, it hasn’t been easy either. Adjusting to our new lives has been difficult for the whole family at times, but unconditional love, open communication, placing focus on little accomplishments and just moving forward helps me. Life goes on no matter what. I believe that we have the choice as to how we are going to face life. Live it or sit back and let it pass you by. I for one say bring it on…I will love you no matter what.  I hate to complain & when I want to, I remind myself that I am alive and that is a precious thing.    

Since I’ll be in hospital for the next few weeks, I will try to post on my blog once again to keep people updated with my recovery. Â
My operation is scheduled for this morning at 7:00 am. and due to the complexity of it, is expected to be a very long one. I imagine I will be snowed once again with the narcotics (falling asleep in my milk again) but will post an update as soon as I am awake enough to do so.  

Welcome back to those who are reading once again. I have missed you too.
Welcome new readers

Hello once again.  I Apologize for my long absence but I have got my blog back up and running. I will attempt to post more often in the coming months and give you an update for those of you still following my story. If you wish to get a sneak peak, you can see me on CBC’s Fifth Estate this evening, December 2nd 2011 at 9:00pm. The show re-airs on Sunday at 11:00 pm as well.

Type to you all soon.

I just received a koala bear. Yup…a koala. How cool is that? An Austrailian “Moore to Life” blog reader named Jane, thought I might like a replacement for my lost “hedgehog” and adopted a koala in my name. I just received the adoption certificate today (sorry Jane…a note explained that it was sent in March but due to problems with delivery, it was redirected & only received today) with an exquisite picture of “Lili” who, I must say, is much cuter than my hedgehog was. The story of Baby Lili explained how she was found sick & injured and taken to the “Koala Hospital” where, with much TLC and perserverance, she recovered and was released (sound familiar?) The adoption proceeds went toward the Koala Hospital. A very touching gift that helped others and is also symbolic as Jane writes to me “this hospital is amazing and the koalas are no less amazing in their determination to heal.” Thanks Jane.

I have received so many gifts since Jan 31st of this year. Be it Gods will, my determination, the selfless aid of many people on the beach that day in Cancun and/or the wonderful paramedics, nurses & doctors, I was given the gift of life. Ok, so I was already alive, but, I came so close to dying that day that I consider life a gift. Subsequently, I have so much appreciation for what I have in life, good or bad. That too is a gift I suppose, but the most beautiful and touching gifts which I have received since my attack are the many gifts given in so many ways from friends, family, businesses & strangers that I will never know; Incredible messages & cards with words that love, support & inspire, hand knit comforts that embrace, prayers to guide, flowers to brighten, meals to nourish, donations to ease worries & provide opportunities, precious time given for visits, volunteering & organizing events and countless other gifts. Even this blog is an extrodinary gift from the awesome Dan Van Damme & Family. The emense generosity of these gifts, no matter how big or small a gesture, touch me so deeply that I am often brought to tears. How or why so many care for my wellbeing is beyond me but I am so thankful for it. Thank-you to everyone for all of your precious gifts.

Life’s precious gifts make me one lucky lady…even if I was attacked by a shark.

10:00 pm and finally sitting down, PJ’s on and my evening cup of lemon tea. This usually is my calming, peaceful time before heading off to a much needed rest, but not lately. Lately, incompleteness plagues my peace in so many ways. I have so much to do but never seem to get ahead lately. I have had so many wonderful moments, great events and some frustrations to share with you all but haven’t been able to. I’ve tried. I’d began to write only to be interrupted by connectivity, people or, as was the case most of the time, I’d fall asleep while writing (I actually fell asleep standing while brushing my teeth. That’s how tired I’ve been). After a while, the amount of stuff to share kept mounting, and I’d put it off for when I had “more time”. Riiiiight. “More time” never comes in busy lives so I wanted to make a moment to say hi to everyone that cares and has been patiently waiting for an update.

I’m doing great!! Would you expect anything else?
My stump is healed and I’ve been eagerly working with the prosthetic team to form my first arm. I should have a practice prototype by Monday (pretty fast huh?) The options are incredible and can be overwhelming both in price and selection. Fortunately, due to my amazing friends and the incredible community that I live in, the fantastic fundraising initiatives have made cost less of an issue now. How does one thank an entire community for such an altruistic and generous gift? I’ll have to share those stories with you in more depth when it’s not so late. It’s incredibly heartwarming. My leg is healing really well. We had a setback with the wound at Easter but it’s on the mend again. If I didn’t have setbacks, I wouldn’t have the same perspective. Sometimes being forced backward gives a better view of where your going. I still have a brace on my leg, but I’m able to walk my kids to the bus and go grocery shopping without a crutch. Not having to use a crutch when you only have one hand opens a whole new world of opportunity for me. I love being home even though it’s frustrating for me not to be able to do so many things that I want to do and needing 10 times longer to do the things I still can do. This is temporary, I know, and I welcome the challenge of finding new ways to do things but it is nonetheless frustrating. I love sleeping in my own bed. I love being closer to friends. I love being home with my husband and I’m sooooo loving motherhood!! My girls have been so sweet and supportive, helping any chance they can. I love the time with my dad and my aunt (who has sadly returned to Italy) who have been my main nurses and shoulders to lean on. Jay has returned to work but recently, his line of work, in our town, has it’s challenges to put it nicely. His stress level hasn’t lessened any…it’s increased.
In a nut shell…I’m still moving forward, step by step and loving all that life has to offer.
By the way, I was interrupted by 2 different people so posting this took more than 2 hours…but I stayed awake .

Hello to all you blog addicts it’s Jay hacking in again……I will attempt to minimize any concerns people may have by letting you know that Nicole is doing amazingly well……like any of you would have thought otherwise. Now that she has returned home it seems that her time is very limited and as such she has had little time to post anything as of late.
Last week was a busy one. Nicole celebrated her birthday with a wonderful dinner and our whole family, kids included, attended an amazing fundraiser for Nicole at the Boston Pizza in Orangeville. It was truly unbelievable what support all of our friends have provided to Nicole and our family. Nicole is making, in my opinion, very quick strides both literally and figuratively. She is throwing the crutch aside and doing laps around the house and of course the shopping mall. Thank you again to all of you for the support you have provided. I am sure Nicole will soon begin to have the time and energy to blog again…..

Here in Orangeville, where the snow just let out out despite persistently low temps and generally miserable weather, it was an absolutely gorgeous day. The temp was only around 15 degrees celsius but with a beaming sun, pure blue skies and only a gentle breeze, it felt like paradise to me. Days like today draw people outside. Maybe to do the run that’s been put off all winter or go for a walk, wash the car, clean the garage or just sit and enjoy it. Anything just to get out. Young and old pass by and wave or stop to chat. Slow as I am these days of adapting to my new one armed life, I was eager to to get outside this morning and catch up with my kids who had already gone outside well before me. I think all of my neighbours were out. Some of you at this point would cringe and do anything to avoid talking to some of them but I am really fortunate as I have the greatest neighbours and many of us are also friends. Being away for so long, it was really nice to see them and catch up with their lives and of course update them with my eventful last few months. We put up our trampoline this weekend so our kids are in jumping heaven since they’ve been asking just about every day since I’ve been home. In the afternoon, my in-laws came for a visit. Again, some of you may cringe, even run and hide and do anything to avoid them, but I’m lucky that I don’t have the typical monster in-laws. In fact, I have the greatest in-laws in the world and they are also the best Grandma & Grandpa EVER!! They came by (a mere 250 km drive) to see how I was doing and to show the girls the baby chicks and baby ducklings that they had just bought for the farm. Soooo cute and a true symbol of spring. The girls were delighted to hold the soft baby birds even if they pooped all over them. The rest of the day I spent sitting in the back yard relaxing and watching my kids jump and play while my husband did the yard work. The end of a perfect day. And even if it rains tomorrow, as they are calling for, my day will still be warmed by the sun of today and from simple perfections.

One girls trip (+1 guy) to Cancun disrupted by a shark attack, two land and one air ambulance, 3 hospitals, 6 teams of surgeons, 8 surgeries, 1 amputation, 127 nurses, 141 mystery hospital meals, 24 blood product transfusions, a kazillion medications and 100% determination.
Being home before expected date of discharge…PRICELESS!!!
Yes, I’m home and I cannot adequately express in words, the feeling of serenity and joy upon walking through that door. I have made it over the mountain and landed in paradise. Children’s hugs and giggles, peaceful night sleeps, healthier food, comforting company. The healing of my body is almost over…now I’ve started the healing of my mind and soul.
I came home on April first, April fool’s day. I did’t tell my kids that I was coming home because I wanted to surprise my kids and boy did we ever achieve it. When the kids came home from school, Jay told them that he had a surprise for them and that it was something that they have been asking for for months but they’d have to find it first. He sent them looking all over half the house and when they were getting frustrated because they couldn’t find it, he yelled “April Fool’s Day!!” The kids were super disappointed as you can imagine (they thought they were getting the Nintedo DS that they have been begging for). Then Jay sent the whinning kids to the kitchen, where I was waiting, to put their school stuff away as they always do. When they turned the corner into the kitchen, they saw me, dropped their bags, yelled “mommy’s home” and came running to me. Again, tears were falling. It was wonderful and they have been very loving and helpful ever since.
I’m walking with a crutch on my right side (obviously) and I have a brace on my left leg which was put there 4 weeks ago to protect the skin graph. The brace comes off on the 13th and I should begin to walk using both legs but I will need lots of physio to re-learn how to walk properly. I have also been keeping up with the prosthetic team and will continue to do so. I’ll be doing my physiotherapy, occupational therapy and prothethtics at Sunnybrook. Sadly, due to budgetary cutbacks and poor insight, there is no longer OHIP covered physio at Headwaters hospital (our local hospital) nor in the surrounding areas. The closest one available to to me was Brampton (1/2 hour away) however, the OT was not willing to take me as a pt due to the complexity of my case (?????). That meant that I’d have to travel to toronto for my OT anyways, so I decided to do all my therapy there.
I’m sorry for taking so long to post a message but when I got home, and could finally get internet service, I wanted some quiet time with my family and to get adjusted to being home again.
Now I have updated my second family…all of you that have supported me throughout this journey. I am sending out my warmest wishes for good health, love and happiness to all of you along with my deepest thanks.

Hi everyone! I figured it out…dinner arrived to our rooms and instead of eating I went to the lounge. Kaching! A free computer. Yes, people eat the food here including myself. Alas, the days of mystery food are behind me along with the lovely hospital smells. I’m at St. John’s Rehab. For those of you that are familiar with the place, IT’S OLD!!! I feel like I passed through some wormhole and ended up in the 40′s but the gardens are gorgeous, even in sprinter (the period between spring & winter). Nuns from the neighbouring convent walk the halls, ready to talk to anyone who needs an ear. Here, that means just about everyone. 10 minutes in the lounge and you’ve heard about 5 different horrific accidents and several debates about whose injuries are worse and why. It’s amazing…kinda like happy hour at the old age home with echos of residents comparing aches & illnesses.

I like this place. I really miss the staff at Sunnybrook, but there is so much more freedom here and it’s peaceful. More importantly, it’s the final stepping stone toward home.  I haven’t had alot of physio yet but I’m growing stronger & stronger each day.  The best part of my day was getting plastered. No, not drinking (how many of you raised your eyebrows briefly in dismay?), I mean with actual plaster. My upper body was first wrapped in panty hose, then wrapped in saran wrap (don’t ask). After that, plaster was slathered on my left upper arm, rubbed, formed and smoothed it until it formed a hard cast. This cast of my stump will be used to make a mold of my arm for the beginning stages of my prosthetic developmemt . Exciting!  I met an amazing woman last week named Kelly who is also an upper arm amputee. She generously gave up her time to visit me and teach me about prostheses, gadgets available to help with tasks, need-to-know tricks and how being an amputee is easier than I thought. She left me with an even greater sense of hope and inspiration. Thanks Kelly.

So far life has been alright at rehab but I’m waiting anxiously for the workout to begin. Have you worked out this week?

Ho ricevuto molti meravigliosi messaggi dagli amici italiani senza avere mai rilasciato notizie nella loro lingua e voglio prendere l’oppurtunita di correggermi.

Sono in  una clinica di riabilitazione dove mi sto “allenando” per il mio ritorno a casa che dovrebbe avvenire presto. E’ con vero sollievo vedere che sto recuperando molte delle mie funzioni guadagnando una discreta indipendenza. Sono stata molto sorpresa e veramente commossa dall’ incredibile supporto ricevuto dall’Italia. Sapevo di avere grandissimi amici, ma non mi aspettavo una prova di affetto cosi’ forte. Le vostre parole sono state di molto aiuto e vi ringrazio di cuore.

Spero di vedervi di persona a Settembre.

Ciao a tutti.